Part of what makes me...ME

At 24 years old, I was not the first person you would suspect to have a pulmonary embolism. Let alone bilateral blood clots in both lungs and a DVT in my right calf. So imagine my surprise when a trip to the ER secondary to chest pain and coughing up blood gave me that result.

I recently graduated with my Doctorate of Physical Therapy. I have spent the last two decades of my life in school and have been counting down the days until it was all over. I've had overall good health up until now, with the occasional cold or sore throat. I've had my musculoskeletal issues due to over training, or just not knowing when to give my body a rest. I've also been on birth control since I graduated high school. I started out on Yasmin, and about a year ago I was switched to Ocella.

My symptoms first started over last Thanksgiving. I was in Atlanta, GA for a clinical rotation about 14 hours away from my hometown. I decided to take a trip down to Tampa to visit classmates for the holiday since we were all orphaned. It was about an 8 hour drive and I was slightly nervous because I had never taken a trip that far by myself. Thanksgiving day during dinner I got a calf cramp. It felt like one of those cramps you get during the night and you feel sore for a couple days afterward. Not a painful sore, just like you worked your muscles the previous day. I brushed it off. As a PT student I know what a DVT is. But again I brushed it off. I'm young, I'm healthy and that stuff doesn't happen to me.

The pain persisted for almost a week. I stretched, I iced, I exercised, I stretched some more. I took ibuprofen. I used heat, I did soft tissue massage. And yet never once did I think, maybe it could be a DVT. I knew the signs, and I knew the risks, and I did nothing.

The pain went away. And I continued with my normal routine. Spinning, running, lifting, biking, swimming, etc. Again I was invincible. I'm young, I'm healthy and that stuff doesn't happen to me.

Fast forward to Christmas eve. I start to complaining of some back pain on the way home from last minute shopping. I went through everything I did at the gym that day that could have caused me pain. I blamed it on my run that day. Christmas day I start to have pain in my ribs on the left side and its starting to hurt when I take a deep breath. I mentioned it to my dad who is a respiratory therapist. He told me to keep an eye on it over the next few days because it could be the start of pleurisy or pneumonia. The next day I started to get pain in my left shoulder. Again my dad says to keep an eye on it because that could be referred pain from pleurisy or pneumonia. By the time Monday rolled around it's not getting any better. I feel a "rubbing" sensation in my left side when I take a deep breath. My dad and I went to the walk in clinic. The standard exam. But the nurse practitioner said something to me that stood out and stayed with me when she sent me to get chest x rays to rule out pleurisy or pneumonia, "Hmm it sounds something like a pulmonary embolism, but then again you're too young for that."

The wheels in my head started turning. My dad and I went over it on the way home. PE? Calf pain at thanksgiving...but that was 4-5 weeks ago with no further symptoms. PE? No way, you're healthy, you're young and that sort of thing wouldn't happen to you.

Tuesday morning I'm awake at 4 AM in severe pain. Severe stabbing pain in both sides of my chest and back. It hurts to breathe, it hurts to move, it hurts in general. I'm starting to cough and this time its not a dry cough. I'm coughing up blood. At this point my no nonsense dad is throwing me in the car and taking me to the ER. If you want door to door service at the ER, tell them you're coughing up blood. You are triaged, and in a room with a doctor at your side in no time. I explained my story, my what seemed like outlandish story to the doctor. At this point it feels like I've rattled off my symptoms for 10+ people in the past two days. And then I mentioned the calf pain from prior and the coughing up blood. I get 6 tubes of blood drawn.

After an hour of watching the Today Show and pretending to be distracted my doctor comes back and explains my D dimers are elevated and I need a contrast chest CT scan. I make a joke about it being my lucky day and blah blah blah. We laugh, but on the inside I'm not laughing. Not laughing at all. I'm young, I'm healthy, and this sort of thing doesn't happen to me.

Another wait and another doctor comes and goes. My chest CT is positive for bilateral pulmonary embolisms in the bases of my lungs. Wait, bilateral? So not one, but two pulmonary embolisms. And now I'm having ultrasounds done on both of my legs to determine whether or not there are more clots that could cause further damage.

Another nurse and another wait and I'm covered in ultrasound gel making small talk with the woman who is about to tell me what I didn't want to hear. "There it is, we spoke too soon. There's a clot behind your right knee." Oh that leg, yea the one I ignored and brushed off as nothing because I'm young, I'm healthy and that sort of thing doesn't happen to me. But the thing is that sort of thing did happen to me.

Drugs are being rattled off at rapid fire, possible scenarios are being discussed with me. Next thing you know I'm being admitted to the hospital for further observation and the only thing I can think to ask my dad is, "Are you sure they won't at least let me go home and take a shower first, I promise I'll come back."

So here I am. 25 years old. I'm still young, but I'm not so healthy anymore. My 25 year old life just got a little more complicated. Somewhere between daily injections of Lovenox into my abdomen and daily blood tests to determine INR levels I'm not so young and not so healthy anymore and this sort of thing just happened to me.

Is my life over? No, not in the least. I'm just not allowed to do some of the things I like to do. My triathlon training is put on hold for the season. But I'm alive. I'm alive when some odds say I probably shouldn't be.

Am I angry? Yes and no. Angry at who? Myself? Ocella? Long drives? It's easy to blame something or someone. Maybe if I had paid more attention at the time this could have been avoided, but that's not the case. The only option I have now is to make the best of an otherwise sucky situation. And share my story and live and learn. And continue to be thankful that even though this sort of thing did happen to me, I'm young and I'm healthy.